


Happy Birthday, Dark Swan

by CaptainSwanLuver



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Dark Emma Swan, Drama, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-28
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2018-04-28 16:45:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5097893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainSwanLuver/pseuds/CaptainSwanLuver
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s Emma’s birthday and she is sure no one will acknowledge it this year.  <br/>But Killian and her family are determined to prove her wrong and make sure she doesn’t spend it alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Happy Birthday, Dark Swan

**Author's Note:**

> So I have been MIA for the last couple of months. As a teacher, the new school year leaves me exhausted and with little time to write. I have been working on a multi-chapter story though, which I hope I can get out soon. This just popped into my head the other day. Hope you enjoy it and please let me know what you thought! ~Steph

…Happy Birthday, Dark Swan: Part 1/1...

Today was her birthday. But Emma knew it would be just like any other day. There wouldn't be a cake and presents. There wouldn't be a party with her friends and family. There wouldn't be birthday cards or phone calls and texts. No, she knew the Dark Swan didn't get to celebrate with loved ones.

Emma felt like that little lost girl in foster care. She never spent more than a year in any one foster home and year after year her birthday went forgotten. You would think she’d be used to it by now. 

But ever since she blew out that candle on that cupcake and Henry showed up at her door, things had been different on her birthday. She had been lucky enough to celebrate a couple of birthdays with her family. Her parents and Henry made sure that no matter what was going on, no matter what villains or curses were wreaking havoc on the town, that they always celebrated her birthday. They would have a party at Granny's with dancing, her favorite food, cake and presents. She knew her parents felt guilty for all of the birthdays they had missed and that was their way of trying to make up for it in some small way.

This year would be different though. She couldn't blame them for not wanting to celebrate with her this year. After all, she had given her loved ones every indication that she wanted nothing to do with them, with the exception of Henry and Killian.

Emma was thrown from her thoughts by the doorbell ringing. Her eyebrows raised at the sound. She never had visitors. Emma walked to the door and opened it. She was surprised to find the space before her empty. When she lowered her eyes to the ground, she noticed a wrapped package lying in front of her. Her gaze scanned her surroundings but she saw no one. She bent down to pick up the package, which had been painstakingly wrapped in glittery paper with the words Happy Birthday all over it. A big, red bow sat on top. There was no card, but there was a little label on it that simply read Emma. 

As Emma closed the door, she felt tears begin to fill her eyes. Someone had decided to acknowledge her birthday. She furiously blinked back her tears.

"Happy Birthday, Emma," she suddenly heard come from behind her. 

She was startled by the sound of his voice, but quickly spun around to face him. 

"Surprised to see me?" Killian asked, offering her that cocky, lopsided grin she loved so much. 

"Actually, yes. Appearing out of nowhere is really my thing. Plus, there’s a protection spell on all of the doors."

"Alas, I have my ways. Perhaps your security leaves a little to be desired."

Emma gestured at the gift she held. "Is this from you?"

"Aye."

"Why not just stay at the door and hand it to me? Why the cloak and dagger routine, Killian?"

He stepped closer to her, his eyes sweeping across her face in that way that always made her heart race. He could see that her eyes were glassy from unshed tears. He knew that was a sign of the woman he loves still being inside her.

"I wished to have the upper hand for once."

Emma swallowed hard. "I...I didn't think anyone would acknowledge my birthday this year."

He nodded. "You told me the woman I fell in love with is still inside you. I believe that and I am going to do everything I can to hold onto that part of you."

Emma's face fell. "So this wasn't about celebrating my birthday then. It was about trying to get my former self back."

Killian stepped even closer to her and took her free hand in his. "I wanted you to know that I'll never stop fighting for us, Emma."

Emma flashed back to that moment in Camelot when he had said those same words to her. He asked her to trust him, believe in their future. And she did. She got on that horse, they rode to that beautiful field of flowers, and Rumple vanished from her head. He would return, but for those few perfect moments as she kissed the man she loves, she was at peace. Killian didn’t remember that moment, but she would never forget it. 

She shook her head free of those thoughts. Too much had happened since then. She couldn't give him the future he wanted anymore.

"This isn't temporary, Killian. This is who I am now. That white picket fence future is an impossible dream."

"Is it?" he asked softly, his eyes staring into hers.

Before the night she sacrificed herself, they had started talking about a future together. Emma told him her dream of living in a nice house with a big yard and white picket fence. She knew it sounded silly, but she had always dreamt of it as a foster kid. 

Killian gestured with his hook. "Emma, you chose a house with a white picket fence outside it. That wasn’t by accident. You still want that future for us."

"So you mean you'd live here with me...as I am now?"

He ignored the question, as he went on. "You told me that you're better now, Emma. That you're not afraid anymore. But you're still afraid of being alone, aren't you? You have been since you were that little lost girl in foster care."

"I'm fine," she said, trying to keep the shakiness out of her voice.

Killian swallowed hard, shaking his head. "If you continue like this, then you'll push everyone who loves you out of your life and you will truly be alone. Is that honestly what you want?"

"I think you should go now," she replied coldly.

Killian paused for a long moment and then sighed heavily. "Aren't you going to open your gift?"

Emma glanced down at the package in her hand. Slowly, she tore through it, her eyes widening at what was revealed.

She looked up at Killian and said softly, "You remembered."

"I remember everything you've ever told me, love."

In her hands, Emma held a Dolly Surprise Pretty Princess doll. The hair on the doll grew and it was one of the most popular toys the year she turned six. She had wanted one so badly. She asked her foster mother for one for her birthday, but her birthday came and went without so much as a card or a “Happy Birthday, Emma”. A week later, it was her foster mother's biological daughter's fifth birthday. She got a Dolly Surprise Pretty Princess doll. Emma remembered crying herself to sleep for a month after that. 

She had told Killian about it one day months ago when they were watching TV and a commercial for a doll came on. She couldn’t believe he remembered. 

"How...How did you find this? They don't make them anymore," she said.

Killian cocked an eyebrow. "Well, Henry told me about this place on the computer box called eBay. Rather strange place. Much like Gold’s pawn shop I suppose. Henry helped me find it on there and purchase it for you."

"I didn't know they accepted doubloons for payment," she said with a smile.

Killian grinned. That was a piece of his Emma shining through. 

"Aye, that they don't. Henry bought it and I paid him. Fortunately for me, the lad’s quite fond of doubloons."

"Thank you. This was very thoughtful of you," Emma said softly.

He shook his head. "This isn't about the doll, Emma. It's about the little girl you were. All you wanted as a child was a family, people who would love and support you. And you found that when you came to Storybrooke. But if you continue on this path, then you'll be right back where you started. A lonely, lost girl." 

Emma felt the tears again, so she blinked her eyes. She took a step forward and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. 

"Thank you again, Killian,” she whispered in his ear.

Then she walked to the door and opened it. He stood rooted to his spot for a long moment. He finally bowed his head, as he walked to the door. He thought he had made some progress getting through to her. Apparently, he'd been wrong.

He stopped before he crossed the threshold. “Your parents told me to give you a message,” he said.

Emma raised her brow in surprise. “And what’s that?”

“They said they’ll be at Granny’s at 7 tonight celebrating your birthday. They hope you’ll consider coming.”

She lowered her eyes. “They don’t really want me there.”

“Of course they do. They wouldn’t be having the party otherwise.”

Emma shook her head sharply. “No, they want the woman I used to be.”

“Emma.”

“Goodbye, Killian,” she snapped.

He let out a deep breath and then said. "Happy Birthday, Emma.”

Killian stepped onto the porch and she closed the door behind him. It was only then that she allowed the tears to fall.

….

Killian entered Granny’s. The preparations were underway for Emma’s birthday. Balloons were scattered about and streamers hung from the ceiling. A huge banner that read “Happy Birthday, Emma” hung on the wall behind the counter. All of her favorite food had been prepared: grilled cheese, onions rings, hot cocoa with cinnamon. There was a huge cake and lots of presents. Music already filled the air.

Mary Margaret and David spotted Killian and walked over to him. 

“How did it go?” David asked.

“Did she seem like she was considering coming to the party?” Mary Margaret asked.

Killian sighed. “I’m afraid not.”

Mary Margaret’s face fell. David put his arm around her shoulder. “She could change her mind. Let’s just wait and see.”

“We missed so many birthdays with our daughter, David. I swore when we found her that we would never miss another.”

“I know, sweetheart,” he said, placing a kiss to her temple.

Killian sucked in a breath. “I did see glimpses of the Emma we know and love today. She’s still there. We just need to keep fighting to hold onto her.”

“That’s a little difficult if she refuses to have contact with us,” David said.

“I know,” Killian replied quietly.

With that, David and Mary Margaret walked away from him.

…

She could hear the music before Granny’s ever came into sight. She continued walking, stopping on the sidewalk that led up to the diner. Emma could see the decorations through the windows and all of her family and friends enjoying themselves. She wanted to walk down that path and into the diner, but she couldn’t make herself move.

Killian sat alone in a booth, drinking his rum. He couldn’t muster the energy to pretend to enjoy himself. Not without her there with him. He lifted his head and looked out the window. His eyes grew wide when he saw Emma standing at the end of the pathway. Their gazes met and held.

Killian jumped out of the booth and hurried outside. Emma quickly turned on her heel to leave, but she wasn’t fast enough for him. She regretted not simply poofing herself away.

“Emma!” he said, as he reached her and gently used his hook to grasp her elbow and turn her around to face him.

“Killian,” she said, their eyes meeting.

“Please, don’t go.”

“This was a mistake. I don’t know what I was thinking coming here.”

“You were thinking that you wanted to celebrate your birthday with the people you love and who love you.”

Emma smiled bitterly. “They don’t love me. They love a memory of me. In fact, maybe I should start celebrating the day I became the Dark One instead.”

“You don’t mean that,” he said.

“I do,” she replied sharply. She waved her hand at the diner. “Go back inside, Killian, before you’re missed.”

“There’s nothing for me in there without you,” he replied.

Emma stared at him for a long moment, before turning to walk away. She only made it a few steps before her mother’s voice stopped her. 

“Emma, please stay,” she called after her.

Emma stopped in her tracks and then slowly turned around to face her parents.

“You belong with your family on your birthday,” David said.

“What’s there to celebrate? The day of my birth was also the day you sent me away. And I spent every birthday for 28 years after that alone.”

Mary Margaret sighed. “Emma, you know we only did that to protect you.”

Emma shook her head. “You failed me then and you failed me in Camelot.”

Killian’s jaw clenched. “Answer me this, Emma. If you like who you are now so much, if you like being the Dark Swan, then how did they fail you? Seems to me they’ve given you exactly what you wanted.”

A smile crept onto her lips. “You’re right, Killian. Maybe I should thank them instead.”

David shook his head. “Emma, however we have failed you, we are still your family and we love you. We missed too many of your birthdays. We don’t want to miss another.”

Emma gestured at Granny’s Diner. “Looks like you’re making do without me.”

She paused for dramatic effect, before waving her hand and disappearing.

Mary Margaret’s face fell, as David pulled her close to him. 

“Come on,” he said. “Let’s go back inside.”

“Are you coming?” Mary Margaret asked Killian as they turned toward Granny’s.

“No. I’ve had enough merriment for one night,” he said.

They decided not to argue with him and simply headed back inside. 

But Killian wasn’t about to let Emma spend one more birthday alone. He knew exactly where to find her.

…

Killian found her standing on the edge of the dock, staring out at the water. He slowly approached her and came to stand beside her.

“Some things never change,” he said.

“I want to be alone,” she replied, her eyes never moving from the water.

“No, you don’t,” he replied. “If you did, then you wouldn’t have come to Granny’s.”

“I told you that was a mistake.”

Killian’s eyes swept across her features. He hadn’t grown accustomed to her pale skin, white hair, and bright red lipstick yet, but he could still find pieces of the woman he loves at times.

He swallowed hard. “You told me how Henry showed up at your door on your 28th birthday. You said you bought a cupcake for yourself and lit a candle. And you blew out the candle and made a wish. Then you heard a knock at the door and it was Henry.”

“Thanks for the walk down memory lane,” she said with a roll of her eyes.

He ignored her tone as he went on. “What did you wish for?”

Emma’s head whipped in his direction and she finally met his gaze. “What?”

“You told me you made a wish, but you never said what the wish was.”

“Does it matter?”

Killian nodded. “Aye, indeed it does.”

Emma dropped her eyes to the ground, her voice lowering. “I wished for a family.”

Killian’s lips spread into a smile. He had been right.

“You got your wish that day, Emma. Your life changed for the better that day. You got the parents you always wanted and a son who adores you. And if Henry had never showed up on your doorstep that day, then we never would have met. So I will be forever grateful for that day your wish came true. And you should be too.”

“It’s not that simple,” she said.

“Aye, that it is. Emma, I would give anything to make a wish and have my family returned to me. My father abandoned me and my mother and brother died. I have lived for centuries without a family. I know how it feels to be all alone in the world. We both know how that feels. But you got your family back and now you’re trying to throw it all away.”

She raised her eyes to meet his. “Family should accept you for who you are.”

Killian shook his head. “No, Emma, family should push you to be your best self. And you know this as far away from your best self as you can get.”

“Agree to disagree,” she replied flippantly.

Killian sighed heavily. “I’ll never get my family back, Emma. You’re all I have in this world or any other and I refuse to lose you too.” 

Emma felt the tears fill her eyes as she desperately blinked them back. 

She heard her voice betray her as it cracked. “Please just go.”

“No,” he said with firm shake of his head. “I’m not leaving you alone on your birthday. We can just stand here in silence all night long if you prefer.”

Emma felt a small smile pull at her lips. “You do realize I can just poof myself someplace else, right?”

“That I do. But I’ll always find you.”

Emma met his eyes and cocked her head. “So now you’re stealing my father’s line? He won’t be pleased.”

He raised an eyebrow and grinned. “I don’t believe he has a monopoly on said line.”

“I suppose not,” she said and returned her gaze to the water.

“So what are you waiting for?” he asked.

“What?”

“I thought you were going to do your disappearing act.”

Emma shrugged. “I know you’re right. You’ll just find me. And I like it here. It’s calm, especially at night.”

Killian reached out and placed his hand in hers, linking their fingers together. Emma turned to look at him, her eyes registering surprise at the gesture that had once been so natural between them. She simply smiled, squeezed his hand, and then returned her eyes to the water.

Killian looked up at the sky and focused on the brightest star. He closed his eyes and made his own wish. He wished to have the woman he fell in love with back. He could only hope that one day his wish would come true too.

…

Emma returned home hours later. She had no sooner closed the door when she heard a knock. Two visitors in one day she thought to herself. She opened the door, a smile appearing on her lips at the sight of Henry. She hadn’t seen or spoken to him since he found out what she did to Violet.

“Henry. What a pleasant surprise,” she said.

“Happy Birthday.”

“Thank you.”

“Here,” he said, holding up a small, white bakery box. “I got you a little something.”

“That was very sweet of you,” she said, taking the box from him and opening the lid.

She smiled at the cupcake inside with a star shaped candle. It was just like the one she had on her 28th birthday, right before Henry showed up at her door.

“It looks delicious. Thank you,” she said. She paused for a moment, then continued. “Henry, I’m sorry for what happened with Violet. I hope one day you’ll forgive me.”

Henry’s expression grew serious. “I hope that cupcake reminds you of the woman you used to be. Mom, you were my hero. You taught me how to be strong and brave. I wanted to be just like you.”

Emma felt tears begin to burn her eyes. “Henry.”

“I hope when you blow out that candle and make a wish, you think about how your life changed for the better that day I showed up at your door. And ask yourself what your life is like now. Is it better?”

Emma stared at him for a long moment. She didn’t know what to say. 

“Bye, Mom. Enjoy the rest of your birthday.” 

With that, he turned on his heel and walked down the porch steps. He heard the door close behind him. Henry found Killian around the corner where he’d left him.

“How did it go?” Killian asked.

Henry shrugged. “I don’t know. The cupcake was a good idea though. Thanks for coming up with it.”

“You’re welcome, lad. Let’s just hope some of what we’ve said is starting to resonate.”  
…

Emma sat down at the kitchen table. She took the cupcake out of the box and placed it in front of her. With a flick of her wrist, she lit the candle. She stared at the flame for a few long moments, the light flickering across her features. Then she closed her eyes and blew. And she made a wish. 

She wished for the strength to choose love over power, light over dark. Only time would tell if her wish would come true.

………………………………...........The End……………………………….......................  
Thanks for reading! Please let me know what you thought! ~Steph


End file.
